22 Awesome Things to do Before Hitting your Thirties like Dr. Jose Rizal

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I was looking through my saved posts in Facebook and saw this post from Dakila. I was inspired to make my list of awesome things to do before hitting your 30s while formatting it to Dr. Jose Rizal’s achievements. The list is down below:

  1. He have mastered 22 languages. I will master Cebuano, Japanese, Korean, Spanish, and French. 
  2. He wrote 3 novels. I will write 1 novel this year, 2017.
  3. Never finish the Mamisa, his supposed third novel. I will write 100 poems. 
  4. Have at least 10 cities in the Philippines named after you. I will volunteer.
  5. He was an anthropologist. I will learn every cities’ and provinces’ culture in the Philippines. 
  6. Travel the world. I will travel the world, learning their culture.
  7. Go to Medical School. I don’t think I can still do this but, I will pursue my Doctorate’s degree after 1 year. 
  8. He was a farmer. I will build my own farm, as well. My mom and I have this dream ever since. 
  9. He was a scientist. I will campaign for environment awareness. Volunteering for forest, river, and sea conservation. 
  10. He have animals named after him, while still studying them. I will volunteer in an welfare society for animals. 
  11. He won 6200 PHP in lottery. How can I even win this? Hahaha I will save up. 
  12. He wrote a Kundiman. I will write a Kundiman.
  13. He built a dam, damn. I guess, I’ll have to
  14. He fixed eye problems. He was a doctor. I am not. I don’t know how I can win against this but, come on who can? He’s a National hero and I am not. I’ll just have to inspire myself to be like him, with his writing. 
  15. He wrote love letters in invisible ink. I will write letters maybe not in invisible ink but, I will write everyone through pen and paper. 
  16. He’s gwapo, meaning handsome. I will be maganda (beautiful) in my own way. 
  17. He made a lot of Art. I will too.
  18. He was a journalist. I don’t have the right to be one but, I am a writer I can write the things I want to tell my readers. No to fake news. No to fake information. 
  19. He built a school. My mom and I have also dreamed of building a school since I was still in high school. 
  20. Teach. I am actually teaching preschool students right now. I guess our National hero and I have a lot in common but, he’s more bright and gwapo than I though. I will teach peace as long as I am teaching.
  21. Revolt when needed. Same. 
  22. He’s a hero. I will be my own hero, too. 

I hope I can achieve this things while still on my twenties. I hope I can achieve these things like he did. I will be my own hero.

 

I’m Taking the Chance

Dear Mom,

I’m only 22, and yes I admit I don’t know what I’m doing. I was quite sure what I wanted to be when I was 12 but, right now I don’t know who am I anymore. When I was 16, I thought I have decided what I wanted to be but, that’s not exactly the truth. I was quite sure, and now I’m back to square one. I still don’t know what I want to do with my life.

Right now, I want to be a lot of things. I want to be a writer. I want to be a museum curator. I want to be a painter. I want to be a filmmaker. I want to be a photographer. I want to be a traveler. I want to be a teacher. But, right now I am nothing near those things. I don’t know if its my insecurities, my fears, or my motivation. I just know that I’m not ready but, I’m ready to leap outside my box.

However, when I have finally come to terms with what I really want, what I want to be precious people goes running around your head saying they would be sad and that it won’t be the same without you, and that makes you contemplate about your decisions. But, right now you’re sure and you know this is what you’ve been waiting for – a motivation to move on, the motivation to finally see things with a different kind of perspective.

This will be one of the biggest decions I will ever have my entire life, and it pains me that I have to turn down all of the things that will keep me from doing what I want to do in my life, and attaining it. Even if it’s a family member.

My mom and I have been apart for many years, and now that she have finally decided to come back home, I decided to go overseas to study and to work. We can’t help it. We’re human beings whose always searching for a great perhaps or because we’re always curious about everything else.

I don’t want to be apart from my mom anymore, but I need to do this for myself. I know she’ll be sad, I will be too. Now, thoughts comes rushing through about how I won’t be able to go back home and won’t be able to see her for quite sometime but, I know we’ll get through it? I’m hesitant, of course.

If I chose to study here, and exclude every possibility and opportunity to study overseas, I know I’ll think about it even I’m with my mom. I know I’ll hate myself for not taking it, and I’ll hate her for taking away this opportunity. I know it’s hard. I know it’s been hard for us for the last couple of years but, this is for my future and this is about taking that chance. And I don’t want to regret anything.

This time, I know what I want to do in my life. This time, I know what I want to be, and I don’t want to take that away from myself just because we’re sad right now. I know we’re all depressed and just want to go home. I know we miss each other, and I know it will be a while again. But, I don’t want to be sad – I don’t want us to be sad – for the rest of our lives that’s why I’m taking this chance. I hope you understand.

 

Beerday

March 11, 2017

Sa araw na ito, sa mundo ko. Ako ang bida. Dahil sa araw na ito ako ipinanganak. Sa mga araw na ito natatagpuan ko ang sarili ko sa kawalan ng utak ko. Sa kawalan ng pagtataka at pangangailangan. Ilang beses akong nag birthday na nagpi-PMS ako. Ilang beses ding nagtaka ako kung mahalaga ba talaga ang araw na ito para sa iba ding taong nakakakilala sa akin.

Ilang beses na walang bumabati sa akin bukod ang pamilya ko. Hindi naman kasi ako ganoong klase ng taong magsasabi na birthday ko ngayon, o naglalagay ng reminder sa FB para sa mga kaibigan ko para matandaan nila. Siguro dahil gusto ko na rin malaman kung sino pa bang mga taong nakakaalala na mahalaga ako para sa iisang araw na iyon.

Pero masaya na ako ngayon, masaya na ako hindi tulad noon. Siguro dahil hindi na ako nagpi-PMS. Siguro dahil may mga taong pinahahalahagan ako. Siguro dahil yung mga taong kasama ko na ngayon e, iyong mga tao talagang masasabi kong totoo sa akin. Para pa din akong bata di, ba? Siguro ganoon ako ka sensitive at emotional. Siguro dahil I longed for that attention that I have never received from anyone besides from my family.

Mas masaya na ako ngayon.

Dahil nagsi-celebrate ako kasama ng mga taong alam kong nandyan kahit na anong kaweirduhan o katangahan ang gawin ko. Nandyan yung mga taong tanggap kung anong ka-emosyonal at kadramahan ang gawin ko. O maski ang medyo pagka-judgmental ko sa napaka daming bagay. Hindi ko kailangang ibenta ang sarili ko para magustuhan nila, o piliting maging okay sa harap nila.

Hindi ko kailangan maging maganda o maging sosyal para lang sumakay sa kung anong bandwagoon nakasakay sila. Hindi ko na kailangan isipin kung successful ba ako o malayo na ba ang narating ko kesa sa kanila. Hindi na ako naiinggit. Hindi ko na kailangang piliting maging masaya sa harap nila. Hindi ko na kailangan ang approval nila para masabing tanggap nila ako o hindi. Masaya na ako sa kung nasaan ako ngayon. Malungkot, oo, nandoon pa rin naman iyon. Pero mas masaya na ako ngayon. Pakiramdam ko nga, bumabalik na ako sa dating ako na kilala ko e.

Salamat sa ate at kuya ko. Na pinagtatawanan lang lahat ng pagkajudger ko at kaignorantehan ko. Sa kaweirduhan at kakulitan ko. Salamat at di niyo pinararamdam sa akin na sobra kong daldal. Salamat dahil kahit na 2 or 3 years, parang nabuo uli ang buhay ko. Nagiba pananaw ko sa buhay dahil sa inyo. Hindi niyo lang alam. Salamat sa mga araw na may mga workshop tayo, dahil kung hindi. Hindi tayo magkakakilala. Hindi mabubuo ang Normalan. Hindi mabubuo ang Bibo Kids. Hindi ako mabubuo. Salamat. Ayaw ko naman ding kalimutan ang iba pang mga kaibigan kong nandyan. Salamat.

Yung Totoo?

Goodbye, secrets. Hello, childhood memories & cringey lines.

Sa totoo lang, natatakot akong magsulat ng autobiography. Natatakot kasi ako na may malaman sa sarili ko na hindi ko pala alam. Does that even make sense? May hindi ka alam sa sarili mo? Pwede ba iyon? Pwede naman di, ba? Katulad minsan, naalala ko, dumaan kami sa isang cafe shop.

Ang madalas ko lang bilin kapag nasa ganong lugar ako it’s either coffee based drinks or tea based drinks. But never the fruit based ones, lalo na ang Strawberry. Eck! Strawberry! Hindi ko alam kung bakit ayoko sa Strawberry. Natikman ko siya, okay, pero maasim. Makita ko palang na may Strawberry sa menu, nagki-cringe na ako. Kasi naalala ko yung asim.

Madaming gusto sa Strawberry. I mean I don’t even know why! Is it because it’s cute? Pero yung lasa! Hindi ko alam iyon sa sarili ko. Hindi ko alam na mayroon pala akong indistinguishable hatred sa Strawberry.

Pero one time, one time lang naman iyon. Hindi na kasi siya na ulit. Napatikim ako ng Strawberry based drink. Medyo maasim, pero naging okay na din. Kasi iyon ang sabi nung crush ko, favorite ko iyan, masarap naman. Okay naman siya di, ba? Uhm, oo na lang?

Ngayon na matanda na ako, well, I’m only 21. Pero kapag inaalala ko yung mga childhood memories ko, I can see this little cheeky girl. Laging nakangiti, laging nakabungisngis. If I may can I describe myself as a ray of sunshine?

Pero that was back then, ngayon hindi ko na alam. Kapag naalala ko yung sarili ko, naalala ko yung drama classes ko nung grade school, ako lagi ang bida! Proud ako, oo! Naalala ko kapag may practice kami, I low key boast them na magpa-practice kami! Alam ko, maraming naiinis sa akin no’n.

Pero proud ako, ngayon ngang naalala ko. Magaling pala akong magmemorize dati? Pero ngayon kahit na gusto kong bumalik, wala na yung confidence ko noon. Hindi na kasing taas, ngayon puro pagduda na lang ang meron ako. Natatakot na ako. Pero gusto ko pa rin bumalik sa teatro, nakakamiss din. Naalala ko, lagi akong nagpapraktis sa mga kaklase ko kapag inaaway nila ako. Nagi-impromtu akong umiiyak. Hindi na alam, fake tears lang yon.

Pero ngayon, hindi ko na magawa iyon. Kasi totoo na yung lumalabas. Napapaiyak na talaga ako. Ngayong sinusulat ko ito, naiisip ko tuloy, anong nangyari sa akin?

Ngayon, kilala na ako bilang pessimist, overthinker, at laging malungkot. Hindi naman ako ganun dati. Naalala ko tuloy nong bata ako, nong nag a-art lessons ako sa Angono sa Miranda. Laging natutuwa sa akin yung art teacher ko kasi ang bibo ko. Pero ngayon, natatakot na akong magsalita o sumagot sa klase.

Isa din siguro yung pambubully sa kulot kong buhok na para naman kasing pugad ng ibon. Kulot na nga lagi pang pinapagupitan ng maikli, kaya naman mas lalong nae-emphasize yung pagkakulot ng buhok ko. Lagi akong inaasar dati, makapal ang buhok, kulot, madaming buhok. Ngayong naalala ko, wala na akong maalala, maybe because I didn’t let it get into my head. Doon nabawasan yung self-esteem ko. Doon naging pangit ang tingin sa sarili ko o sa mga tao na lang.

Pero mayroon akong kaklase ewan ko kung naalala ko pa ung ikaw iyon, o kung naalala mo pa. Grade school kami noon, paakyat kami sa classroom tumingin siya sa akin, “Maging proud ka lang sa buhok mo,” it was something along this line. Hindi ko na maalala yung exact words pero yon yung nag convince sa akin na hindi magpastraight ng buhok at kahit na inaasar nila ako, pinanindigan kong ipagpatuloy na dalin yung buhok ko ng ganon. Pinahaba ko, pero pinusod ko lang.

Thank you pala, dahil don kahit isang tao lang may naka appreciate sa buhok ko. Thank you, A.P. Thank you nga din pala sa best friend ko na si Julia. I don’t know if she still considers me as her best friend, though. Alam ko, parang blurry pa rin yung nangyari sa atin noong high school, parang wala talagang naging closure yung pag-aaway natin pero naging okay pa rin tayo after all those years. Salamat. Nakapag-Skype pa tayo. Okay naman tayo. Parang walang nangyari. Pero I know, nakatatak na sa’yo iyon. Sa atin. Pero masaya akong nakausap pa rin kita. Malalaman mo kung gaano katagal tayong hindi nagkausap sa paglaki ng mga kapatid mo. Hindi ko man nasasabi sa’yo, o hindi ko man nasabi sa’yo na sorry at thank you sa mga pagkakataon na iyon. Ngayon I have this chance, susulitin ko na.

Julia, oo si Julia Stefi. Sorry ako yung unang tumalikod sa’yo. Siguro dahil na din I was dealing a lot of issues back then myself too. Hindi ko kinaya. Kung iisipin natin ngayon, shit! Ang babaw pala natin nong grade school/high school. I mean this might be too late pero I still care for you. Kung mabasa mo man ito, let’s talk. I miss you. Salamat at naniwala ka sa akin all those years, thank you for turning your lovely straight hair into a curly one. Tumatak sa akin iyon. Hindi ko makakalimutan yon, alam mo yan. Ikaw nagbigay sa akin ng 100 % boost sa self-esteem ko.

Salamat din sa pagiging saviour ko noong mga panahon na gusto ko ng tapusin lahat, kahit na magkagalit tayo. Kahit hindi tayo naguusap, tinulungan mo pa din ako. Sinagip mo pa din ako. Salamat at hindi mo ako pinabayaan na tapusin lahat. Siguro kong hindi ka nagsumbong no’n, siguro pinagpatuloy ko iyon. Siguro hindi ako magiging ako ngayon kung hindi mo ako sinagip noon. Hindi mo lang alam. Dapat siguro matagal ko ng sinabi to sa’yo pero, hindi ko lang alam kung kailan dapat sabihin o kung kailang dadating yung timing.

Pero heto na, siguro this is the right time. Thank you.

Maraming salamat din sa mga taong tumanggap sa akin, ang S.G. Salamat at kahit papaano tinanggap niyo ang bunganga ko at bungisngis ko. Nakatulong sa akin iyon para hindi ko makalimutan yung sarili ko kahit papaano. Salamat sa pagiging best friends ko after all those years. 10 years na ang friendship na ito. Akala ko hindi na ako makakakilala ng best friend sa buong buhay ko. Salamat at naging permanente ko kayong mga kaibigan.

Nong grade school/high school ako, palipat-lipat ako ng mga kaibigan. Hindi sila nagtatagal dahil mas may gusto silang kaibigan kesa sa akin. Ako lagi yung itinuturing silang best friend. Kaya nong 1st year high school ako nakilala ko tong grupong ito. Puro matatalino, magaganda. Ako lang iyong naiiba. Pero at that time naghahanap lang ako ng grupong pwede kong maimpress para makasali sa grupo nila. Heto, ito yung grupong nauto ko. Itong grupo ng mga babaeng matatalino, magaganda at talented. Hindi ko nga alam kung paano nila ako natanggap. Kasi ako yung kabaligtaran nilang lahat.

Sa 10 years na pagkakaibigan na iyon, salamat sa mga baho at sikreto. Sa mga intellectual intercourse pero tsismisan talaga. Sa mga eye-opening subjects at sa pag gising sa pagkababae ko (whoa). At self-acceptance sa napakaraming aspects ng pagiging babae. Pero salamat sa pagtanggap sa akin.

I-screenshot niyo na ito, dahil baka mawala niyo na naman yung letter ko nung high school tayo. Napaka-cheesy kaya no’n na dapat binabalik-balikan natin. Sino ba kasi nagtago no’n?

After grade school and high school, came college. Doon nag downhill yung self-esteem ko, yung self-worth ko. Pati na din yung existence ko, tinanong ko. Pagtungtong ko ng college, nakalimutan ko kung sino ako. Nakalimutan kong nagteteatro ako, nakalimutan kong nagpe-paint pala ako. Nakalimutan kong maging literature nerd, nakalimutan kong maging weird. Nong grade school at high school kinuwestyon yung appearance ko, nong college kinuwestyon kung sino ako.

Nagsucceed naman sila. Kasi nakalimutan ko nga. Doon ako umiyak ng maraming beses na hindi alam ng mga kaklase ko kung bakit. Parang every other day ata may mental breakdown ako. I was contemplating my existence’s worth. Wala akong kaibigan, wala akong maipagmalaki. Lahat sila matatalino, naisip ko ba kung tama bang kinuha ko yung course ko na pang matalino. Natakot ako.

Buti na lang, buti na lang. Noong nag third year kami, may nagabot sa akin ng kamay na makawala don sa takot na iyon. Mean siya, pero totoo. Gusto ko iyon, kahit na paminsan-minsan nasasaktan ako sa mga sinasabi niya. Pero nasanay ako, bumalik yung alahati ng dati kong pagkatao. Kahit na napilitan lang siyang kaibiganin ako. Nagpapasalamat pa din ako, kasi tinanggap pa rin niya ako kahit na ano ako. Kahit na gaano ako ka weird, nerd, at iyakin. Alam mo yung tumatakbo ka sa madilim na tunnel? Umiiyak ka na sa isang sulok, pero may tumatawag sa’yo. Dim lang yung ilaw nila pero natatanaw mo? Kaya sinubukan mong tumayo, pinakinggan yung boses na tumatawag sa’yo at nang makompirma mong may tumatawag sa’yo at hindi mo lang guni-guni. Tumakbo ka sa boses na yon, at sinundan mo. Yung dim na ilaw unti-unting lumiliwanag. At nandoon sila. Nakangiti sa’yo. Pinagtatawanan ka. Tatanungin kung anong nangyari sa’yo. Sasabihan ka pa na para kang tanga. Pero okay lang, kasi gumaan yung pakiramdam mo na nandoon lang pala sila. Hinihintay ka. (Sa totoo lang naiiyak ako. Miss ko na kayo.)

Werlyne! Trixie!

After graduating college nag M.A ako at ipinagpatuloy ang pagiging nerd ko for Literature. Medyo nangangapa pa rin ako, lalo na pagdating sa mga highfalutin words. Pero hindi na tulad dati na tinatanong ko ba kung para sa akin ba ito, o kaya ko ba ito. Ngayon, tinatry ko na lang mag improve para masabi ko naman sa susunod sa sarili ko na you’ve improved a lot! Ngayon, tinatry ko na uling bumalik sa teatro, pero mag-iipon na muna ako. Nagpepaint na uli ako, paunti-unti. Minsan nag D.I.Y ako, tinatry ko lahat ng forms ng art. Pati paggawa ng videos, tinatry ko na din. Gusto ko talagang itry ang photography pero wala akong maayos-ayos na camera pa, pero I’ll get there.

Sa ngayon, iyan lang muna.

Nakalimutan ko nga pala, Katherine Anolin nga pala.

WRITING CHALLENGE

I’ll challenge myself with this little writing challenge so I won’t have the time to laze around and, to make myself more motivated to do something. I may or may not find a substantial material while doing this, I don’t know.

  1. Write a Short Autobiography – February 02, 2017
  2. Write a Fanfiction
  3. Review a Movie/Book/Anything – June 27, 2017
  4. Rant about Anything
  5. Write a Letter to Anybody
  6. Write about your Feelings for Someone – June 25, 2017
  7. Write a Short Poem  – July 1, 2017
  8. Write about Anything You Want
  9. Write a Love Story
  10. Write a Letter to your Future Self
  11. Write about Anything that’s Currently on your Mind
  12. Short Story
  13. Write about something you absolutely love
  14. Write about anything you want

10 to 1 CHALLENGE

10 TO 1 CHALLENGE

I didn’t know how to introduce myself, and I wanted to write/post something today because if I don’t post anything I think I will just leave this blog as it is again. So, I’m starting with this little challenge that I got from Tumblr. Check it out if you want to do this in your blogs as well.

10 Facts about Yourself

1.  My name is Katherine Anolin P –

2. Whenever I buy houseplants they would end up dead.

3. I’m not scared with cockroaches but I’m sure as hell scared with lizards.

4. I don’t have siblings.

5. We had a dog named after Bush.

6. I graduated from FEU.

7. I’m taking up my master’s degree in UST!

8. I was born on March 11, 1995; I’m 21 now!

9. I have three dimples that don’t really show up if I wanted them to.

10. I have curly hair.

9 Favourite Songs

1. She Will be Loved – Maroon 5

2. Hero/Heroine – Boys Like Girls

3. I wanna – The All American Rejects

4. Champagne Supernova – Oasis

5. Ocean Avenue – Yellowcard

6. Misery Business – Paramore

7. Crush Crush Crush – Paramore

8. Welcome to the Black Parade – My Chemical Romance

9. Thnks fr th mmrs – Fall Out Boy

8 Places You’d Love to Go to

1.  Barcelona, Spain (I’d really like to take a Euro-trip though!)

2. Paris, France

3. Tuscany in Florence, Italy

4. London, England

5. Bankok, Thailand

6. Bali, Indonesia

7. Seoul, South Korea

8. Tokyo, Japan

7 Things You Couldn’t Live Without

1. Good food, please. (Nom nom nom)

2. Skincare products

3. Books

4. Music player

5. Bed/Pillow

6. Notebooks/Pens

7. Internet

6 People Who Inspire You 

1. Definitely, my mom.

2. The Almighty

3. Life

4. Yoo Jaesuk; If you don’t know him he’s a Korean host, comedian, and television personality. He is also a national figure, he’s South Korea’s MC. He inspires me because he made me assess my life and, view it in a different way. But, I’ll give an example:

When he was just starting as a host, he was cast to be in a live broadcast. He was only a novice back then, and being in a live broadcast back then is no laughing matter. Of course, as a novice, you’d be nervous and anxious. However, right after he started talking – he stammered, forgot some of his lines, and even said that he’s starting right from the top. It became a national laughingstock but, it became his motivation to improve himself.

As an aspiring speaker, I would like to inspire myself with his perseverance and courage to conquer your fears and mistakes. I couldn’t summarize in detail his life story but if you want to know more about him, just go here: Yoo Jaesuk.

 

5. Emma Watson

6. J. K Rowling

5 Favourite Girls/Women

1. Aubrey Plaza

2. Jennifer Lawrence

3. J.K Rowling

4. Emma Stone

5. Emma Watson

4 Favourite Boys/Men (More like British men, yes?)

1. James Mcavoy

2. David Tennant

3. Martin Freeman

4. Benedict Cumberbatch

3 Things You Like About Yourself

1. Good listener, I think I would also like a friend who’d hear me out and listens to me rant or just ramble about things. There are times that you just want to talk about the universe and, contemplate life and death. We sometimes want someone who we can agree or disagree with us, someone who can we debate about pizzas should have pineapple or federalism. And I want to be someone like that for someone as well.

2. Thoughtful, I don’t know if I am but, I hope I do. I just want to be that someone who takes care of everybody else and, forgets about themselves. I want to be selfless as possible as I can be. I think that’s all that matters in life, taking care of someone’s well-being and knowing that you’ve done your part as a human being.

3. Permissive, I don’t want to be biased and add up to this judgemental society anymore. I mean, there are a lot of people who thinks they know you but honestly they don’t, and that just makes you mad. I want people that surround me that I can be there no matter and, that I won’t judge them from what they did. I just want them to know that I’ll be there no matter what.

2 Things You’re Looking Forward To

1. Written Comprehension Exam + Thesis (Help me, God)

2. Teaching!

1 Quote You Live By 

1. Timing is Everything.

Simula

Paano nga ba magumpisa, kung pangalawa, pangatlo, at di na mabilang na paguumpisa na ang nagawa?

Heto na naman tayo, hala sige, ulit uli sa umpisa. Hindi ko na alam kung pang ilang gawa – pagattempt ko na magumpisa ng “blog” kuno.

Shempre, ako itong si magaling nag-try mag blog, para sa mga dito na ako “magsusulat” kung may naisusulat nga, pero heto nandito pa rin tayo sa umpisa. Nangangapa kung ano ng sunod na gagawin at kung ano ng landas na tatahakin.

Simula. Parang blankong papel, hindi mo alam kung saan ka dadalhin o pupulutin.

Sana ito na ang huli kong paguumpisa sa paggawa ng “blog” sana’y mapanindigan ko na ang pagsusulat. Sana rin ay hindi na ako maging tamad. At sana, hindi na lang sa pangarap ako bibong magsulat, at makapagsulat.

Ayan ang aking heartfelt na first post, ayon lamang sa ngayon!

Kitakits! Laters, behbeh!

Kate